Loss Into Love

This post is dedicated to all of my friends who have lost a loved one....

What a day!! I woke up this morning with happiness in my heart and the willingness to allow the day to unfold as is. I don't think I had any idea how much of a shift was on the verge of occurring. Isn't it beautiful how a shift begins to activate and take place in ourselves long before we are aware of it....it's like watching a movie with no sound....it's happening but we are not fully aware of what is going on until we set the volume and fully tune in.

Today I went for hospice orientation, something I have anticipated doing for the last 6 months. I discovered that I had some more processing to do and that when it was time I would be nudged in that direction. I received the nudge and arrived at the orientation today with an open heart and mind.

I must confess, during the first 15 minutes, I was filled with tremendous anxiety and fear. My mind was racing and my ego began to share it's opinion of my service interest. At that point instead of completely surrendering to the anxious feeling and allowing the fear to overcome me, I made a choice. I made a choice to acknowledge those feelings & let them pass. I reflected on the teachings of my spiritual teachers, especially all of the beautiful insights Ram Dass has shared on death & dying. The reflection allowed me to be free of all fear and anxiety at that moment.

Something else happened at that moment, for the first time ever I was able to step out the story that "I lost a close friend to cancer" and step into the willingness of gratitude and service. I have a tremendous amount of gratitude for the opportunity I was given to know and experience life with Coop....so much gratitude it brings me goosebumps! Yet my journey can not end because of the loss, I now get to share and infect the world with unconditional love, kindness, and enthusiasm that Coop shared so freely with me.

Tonight when taking off the rubber lung cancer bracelet I received from Coop and have worn everyday, it broke. I felt a little bit of sadness, but the symbolism was beautiful and assured me that letting go does not erase the love and memories that will carry on forever.

To anyone who has recently lost someone, please feel the support and love I am sending as I assure you that you are not alone! There is absolutely no right or wrong way to grieve and please be assured that a candle of hope is lit for you everyday!

I could never thank you all enough for your support....I am so lucky to be on this journey with you!

In Love & Service,

Erin

Touched By Grace

"Gracefulness has been defined to be the outward expression of the inward harmony of the soul" -William Hazlitt


Hi Fellow Light Workers...

I have been listening to the KD cd as I mentioned in my last post and the song "By Your Grace" has glued itself to my heart. I have really connected to this song, because the journey is not always easily...especially when you are so passionate about something that others resist.

An update on my spiritual journey....It takes a lot of courage...and some days I just want to say "forget it all"....and then I am touched by grace. I chose to follow my passion and share love and positive energy with everyone!

The other day I lost my keys at the Zoo (only to discover later...they were in the diaper bag the whole time), but the day ended with a beautiful realization. I have always wondered why the silliest and sometimes not so fun things happen to me.....and then something happens and the situation gets much better. For instance...I lose my keys...and then they are found. I discovered that the "bad" things happen to test my reaction and provide me with a lesson....then I am touched by grace. Suffering is totally optional....and I don't go for that anymore!


Love & Light,

Erin

Serenade Your Soul...

Tonight I serenade my soul to the beautiful new Krishna Das CD Heart As Wide As The World I just received.

This CD delivered a little lesson in patience to me before its arrival. I pre-ordered the CD and anxiously waited for the release date and for it to me mailed to me. Each day I would arrive home and search the house to see if it had been delivered. One evening my step dad asked what I was waiting for, so I explained and he said "patience" and I said " I have none".....

One month later....my CD has arrived....and yes the wait and lesson in patience makes listening to it that much sweeter!

Loving my breathwork/meditation room by the way....tonight I layed in the middle of the room while serenading my soul...amazing how hearing KD sing instantly brings me back to Hawaii and the Ram Dass retreat. I can't help but cry tears of ecstasy remembering the week of bliss we spent among beautiful souls!

What's serenading your Soul??

Love & Peace...

Erin

Follow Your Dreams, Dance In Your Passion...

This is dedicated to the ONE I love...

I am very eager to share that I am writing this blog from my beautiful new home in St.Louis! I am totally in love with the vibes and character this space is filled with. I almost settled for something that was pretty and new, but I managed to find a little bit of recycled patience and Babaji led me to this incredible space!!

So what's my favorite part of the new house? The meditation/breathwork room of course!

Here are some photos of the space...I will be adding a much bigger alter shortly!




I get very excited about the new changes to my life, as I feel each experience on this journey is connecting me with my passion and the Divine in everything. Change is always occurring and I do my absolute best to go with the flow and remain in happiness and gratitude. My friend is always saying that the alternative doesn't appeal, so he chooses to stay happy and in the now. I think that is a great outlook!


Speaking of change, right now is a time of many many big shifts throughout the world. One thing I am tuning into is the drastic career changes some are making. I have witnessed people who have lost their jobs and moved into a direction that fulfills their passion. I feel everyone should do what they are passionate about...and don't worry jobs will get done....some people are passionate about recycling and proper waste management in the environment as others are passionate about bringing therapy through the arts to heal.

Fear invites itself in to get in the way when some are on the edge of their passion or divine purpose....overwhelmed by uncertainty they hold back. There is a great quote by Fritz Perls, "Fear is Excitement without the Breath". I read that and let out a big "TOTALLY"!!

Follow your dreams, Dance in your passion!

Love,Love,Love!

Erin

Let Your Heart Break Open..

Hi Beautiful Blessings...

Yes too long since I have written...and though I think of this blog and you often...I have been pretty reluctant to writing. Tonight in my meditation something sparked my heart and I knew it was time to resume the blog.

Speaking of hearts...I am currently reflecting on the expression "Let Your Heart Break Open"...

I sat at my alter tonight in tears of gratitude for all that is and has ever been. I got a brief slideshow of my past three years on this journey and all the times I have sat at my alter in various states of being. I have found myself in tears during meditation in the past three months, more then ever before. Frightened and fearful of this in the beginning, I have now come to accept that it is just my heart breaking open.

With every tear I allow my ego to dissolve and allow the flow of love and awareness to open me up. I do my best to surrender all of my fears and emotions in that moment and trust that spirit will infect me with the bliss. I don't quite understand all of the heartbreak that has occurred on a conscious level, but when I close my eyes and turn within...I am overcome with the most powerful feeling of complete understanding. It is a knowing in the heart, that everything leading up to this very moment has been in perfect Divine order.

Nothing could ever change how much I love you....unconditionally...forever and ever!

Just Dance!

Kalispera, as they would say in Greek! I just watched a movie about Greece and have every intention to visit that beautiful & magnificent country someday soon!!

I know I have slacked off a bit in the blogging world, to think If I was striving to make this blog a hit.....I would have to post 3-4 times a day. I personally just blog when I feel inspired to share some spiritual gibberish when the moment sparks!

This week has been all about discovering patterns and negative thoughts I have attached myself to like gorilla glue. I hit a speed bump of grief early this week and it has been dragging behind me ever since. Grief is a very heartbreaking,uncomfortable, and a rather disturbing state of being....yet in this state one can can have the most beautiful spiritual awakenings. So, as uncomfortable as it is I will sit with my grief, offer it a cup of tea, and trust it will be packing up soon.

If you experience grief...happiness is bound to be lingering around somewhere right? As it says in the Tao Te Ching: Being and non-being create each other.Difficult and easy support each other.Long and short define each other.High and low depend on each other.Before and after follow each other. So breathe easy and know that with this grief will one day come joy,happiness, and the wholeness that seems so far away.


Something fun I wanted to share before wrapping this up...My friend Pam and I are in the process of helping organize a transformation movement weekend with Roger Sams. Sunday while brainstorming, I came across a poem Roger Sams wrote and shared at a past workshop. I don't have the poem to post right now, nor do I have Roger's permission yet- but look for it in a later post. The gist of the poem was all bout dancing in whatever life throws at you. One of the lines talks about even dancing in your own blood & I was so moved by that!

This past weekend I attended a fundraiser dance event and observed everyone dancing in state of bliss. The beautiful thing about dancing is it is almost impossible not to smile. When we dance we let off such a high vibrational frequency that only allows good to flow in that moment...no matter what the outside circumstances are! Tonight I was reminded in the Greek film how important it is to dance. The actor was talking about how in the Greek culture they dance no matter what- rain or shine!

I leave you with a quote from my favorite song-

" You can't dance and stay up tight, it's a supernatural delight. Everyone was dancing in the moonlight".

Loving you just because!!

Erin

Manifest... Easy as 1-2-3

Let's start this with a BIG THANK YOU to you wonderful people for taking the time to read my blog. I know life gets busy, but how super groovy are you to stop by and visit ;)

I'd like to give special thanks to the Universe for giving me everything I ever asked for....it may not be here on the physical plane yet.....but it's so close I can taste it!! Everything I have ever desired is like craving a cheeseburger.....I can smell it...taste it...imagine what it will be like when I eat it...AND suddenly I am feeling how it would feel if I was eating the cheeseburger in this moment....

Manifestation is what I am sharing about. Thoughts become things....of course not every single thought...but yes the thoughts that you hold on to and believe in!!

Try this:

Next time you are in a parking lot, do not hold the thought of "I won't find a parking space"....instead focus on the thought " My parking space is waiting".....see how it goes....

Have something you wish to manifest in your life? PERFECT....here is the three step process....

1.) Ask....don't be afraid...you are worthy of all that it is you desire....
2.)Answer.....don't worry about a thing....yes the Universe heard you and graciously agrees you should have that..
3.)Receive....feel that feeling as if what you asked for has already showed up....it may take some imagination but you can do it....when you activate joy, happiness, excitement, and gratitude you are aligning yourself with that which you are asking for....

Yes, it does take some faith...but what do you have to lose....take a chance...create the life you have always dreamed of!! I support you in all of your creations and I wish all the abundance of the Universe to shower upon you!

Martin Luther King once said " You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step."


Keep on keepin' on.....

Loving you with all my heart!!

Erin